Movie Review: Om Shanti Om

Powered by: Chakpak.com	Om Shanti Om

This year it seems Shahrukh Khan’t do any wrong. Considering that the movie suffers from a severe disease of Nostorycarcinoma the brains at Red Chilly Productions have pulled off an unlikely coup. Farah Khan has presided over the marriage of two classics Karz and Madhumati and in the process created a sequential narrative with predictable ends. However full marks to her for the flawless execution of this copied/palgiarised/inspired piece of fun. I wonder how many of you have seen the original classic “Reincarnation of Peter Proud” from which Karz was “inspired”. Bollywood never copies, it’s always inspired, Mind It.
Now why I did like the movie? It’s actually a celebration of an era in Hindi movies namely the 70s when the gross, the inane and the hamming jet set were the name of the game in Bollywood. Rajesh Khanna was driving the nation hysterical with his “adaas”. God, how did we ever tolerate him? Every movie had the same story with an apology of a difference here and there. Clothes were as loud as Shotgun Sinha’s dialogues. I even spotted SRK wearing outfits similar to RK’s in Hathi Mere Sathi (an all blue shirt/pant rig). Since the hair was worn long careless flicks of the head to remove the locks of the hair from the face have been done with panache.(Psst, I have to do it all the time now). Bell bottoms make a comeback. And the drive of SRK to become a Hero one day is reminiscent of a zillion stories of millions who nurture stars in their eyes. There is also this nonchalant portrayal of a latent desire of every male to attain the dream girl of the silver screen. Our hero is lucky but only just.
Now this leads me on to debutante heroine, Deepika Padukone. I hope I got the name right otherwise Dhoni will probably hit me over the long on for a mighty six. Well Papa Parkash, kya shot mara hai yaar ! His baby is a stunner. Big beautiful eyes, long slender legs, the neck of a gazelle and eyes and a smile to die for. I repeatedly fell in love. I really wished that she should have been given a larger role. Considering all her assets she deserved better. What a waist, I mean waste.
The movie also reminded me of Norman Mailer. May his recently freed soul rest in peace. In his classic book "The Naked and The Dead" he invented the word fug as a substitute to the original four letter obscenity to cater to the conservative sensibilities of the 1940s. Farah Khan got "inspired" to have SRK constantly mouth "What the fish" in the movie. The language English is obviously not her forte but what the fish happened to the taste of the educated SRK who despite his six packs can’t hide an ageing face. He has however gone about his job with clinical efficiency. Shreyas Talpade is finding his feet and will go a long way. Apni Chandigarh product Kiron Thakur Singh (I prefer her maiden name) is of course outstanding. But the surprise package was Arjun Rampal. He was always a good eye candy for girls but here he has acquitted himself well in the male version of Simi’s role.
There are two aspects of the movie which are both novel and endearing. The techniques of the movie making have been shown with refreshing candour. The mock making of a South movie was a particular delight. So Yanna Rascalla, the gross hamming has been done with élan. Secondly the visual presentation of the entire production staff dancing away at the end is a very thoughtful gesture to the unseen contributors.
How do I rate the movie? Without doubt it is going to be amongst the top grossers of the year and in the movie trade jargon it is “Paisa Vasool”

Movie Review: Jab We Met

Powered by: Chakpak.com	Jab We Met

The return of the love story! It ought to be marked as a date of importance when in the commonest of movie themes, Hindi cinema took a break from the boy(rich or poor) meets girl (poor or rich) and then their parents fight to the inevitable end. Yawn… is how I started watching this movie at 8 pm, at the insistence of my newly turned adult daughter. Since she already knows everything there is to know about mankind my obsolete self had little choice in the matter.
I am glad I surrendered. The movie starts with a journey being undertaken by a two individuals. One a self pitying procrastinator and the other a 2007 terminator with a machine gun mouth. Both of them start their journeys like most of us in life. A little excited, a little disappointed, a lot of expectations. But then life always takes you where you want it to. (well almost always.. the message of the movie is the same).
Kareena Kapoor, please take a bow. You have done your illustrious genes proud. Such vivacity I have seen preformed rarely. The name that immediately comes to my clouded brain is Vivian Leigh a-la Scarlett-O-Hara. The director Imtiaz Ali will be patted on the back(thumped more likely) and treated with a big glass of lassi or something equally sinful whenever he is here for portraying the joi-de-vivire of the rural Punjab. So we forgive him for not showing the actual Bhatinda railway station. But the chosen house, the depiction of the Punjabi culture will always make Imtiaz my Bhraa (brother for the uninitiated). Shahid comes through with a superlatively restrained performance. And Dara Singh I have always been partial to. He can not make a wrong step. So there.
So whatever happened to the meano in me. Well, he is alive and well. The climax of the movie is very westernized and out of the synch with ethos of the movie. Ok, I don't mind the super mini skirts and the designer micro dhotis on imported models but an innocent little Gidda or a bhangra would have been better. Nevertheleass for all who do go and see the movie it going to be "Maujan hi maujan"

An Ode To The Curry

So what makes a good curry? It starts with meat. Mutton (top priority), chicken (everybody wants it), fish (everybody should want it), kaleji (aah, the discerning salivate), keema (the royal choice), paaye (only the hard core carnivore's choice). Well take your pick. The first ingredient is a lot of love of cooking for OTHERS. The second is the right choice of cooking medium. Ghee, OK will do, refined oils, who bhi chalega but the sweetheart who burns for you is always mustard oil. The tangy taste it provides cannot be replicated. Don't let any pretentious chef tell you otherwise. The following applies to mutton.
Deg main daalo tel. Get hold of some tej patta, moti and chhoti ilaichi, some laung and let it loose in the simmering oil. Put your lovely face on top of the smoldering cauldron and take a deep breath. The aroma ought to be equivalent of putting you back by one drink. Now throw in the chopped onions (3 to a kg). While they fry go to the bar to make a decent drink, preferably 90 cc of a good whisky with or without water and a lot of ice. Run to the kitchen and add a few heaps of ginger garlic paste to the almost done onions. A few swirls in the cooker and a few swigs later let the meat enter. And now turn turn turn. Turn till the kingdom come for this shall make or break your reputation as a cook. Go back to your bar again, this time increase the quantity of booze and decrease the water. This is very important. Finish half the glass and run back to the kitchen. Turn turn. By now the color of flesh, yours as well as the one at your mercy ought to change. (Note: If yours is constant go back to the bar again. For all others revert back to the previous sentence). Flap your hands and seek three spoons of ground coriander, one of haldi and one of garam masala, the desired salt and flip em all into the cooker. Turn turn turn. And turn right back and finish the glass that you left half finished. Pour another one and carry this one to the kitchen. Grind about 7,8 green chillies and mix them with about four red tomatoes. Now add this to the meat and mix well. Wait for this to mix and boil and finish your drink. Put the lid on the cooker and walk back to the bar, slowly and steadily. Recharge your glass, turn on Mozart's 25 th Symphony in G Minor and dream. In the midst of your heaven the cooker shall yell its first whistle. Put the burner flame on low and go back to your fantasies. Spend ten minutes dreaming of the unattainable and turn off the flame (pun unintended). Have another drink, change and go to sleep. By now you are in no position to eat. In any case this stuff always tastes better the next day.